It's World Entrepreneur's Day, and we think boss ladies are the best. We chatted with Amy Boyajian, founder of the sexual wellness site Wild Flower to hear a little more about what it's like being in charge.
AM: Tell us a little bit about yourself and your typical day.
AB: I own an online sexual wellness store named Wild Flower, and my day gravitates around its day to day functions. My morning usually consists of checking emails while sipping some coffee. Before I dive into my day, I always make a point to work out. Exercise not only helps to get my body going, but also my mind. I come up with some of my best ideas while on on the elliptical.
I spend the morning packing up orders and taking them to FedEx with my puppy Luna. After that it’s checking in with social media, inventory, and any emails. Most of my day is researching, writing, and ultimately creating content for the site. A big part of Wild Flower is its education, blog, and sex Q&A pages so I try to update them every week.
Aside from Wild Flower, I love to paint and I’ve been an avid reader since childhood. I love being outdoors, whether that be for a hike or a wander around the city. Museums are my favorite way to spend a day and I can get lost for hours in one. I also have an insane sweet tooth that will never be satisfied.
AM: You have a degree in business and marketing, but eventually became a dominatrix and now own Wild Flower Sex. Can you tell us more about this unconventional (and really fascinating!) journey?
AB: It is kind of a wild journey I’ve been on! I gained my degree at FIDM in LA at 19 and started in the world of vintage fashion. I was still pretty new to America (I’m originally from the UK) and was basically just figuring things out as I go. I moved to NYC when I was 22 to work in a vintage and second hand store in the East Village. Moving to the city was the shock of my life! I had no idea how expensive it would be and how competitive and saturated certain markets were. It was hard however I pursued. New opportunities came about and I worked as a personal assistant, in fashion, in photography, in nightlife, and eventually in production.
It was production that lead me to one of NYC most acclaimed dungeons in search of dominatrixes to host a birthday party. After finding how much they made and being offered a position, I quit my 3 jobs and became a full time dominatrix. It was really wild and I had no idea what I was doing. But I persisted and eventually learned enough skills to become independent.
Working as a dominatrix, I got a deep insight to sex and sexuality. Clients trusted me with their shame and pain surrounding sex and it was rewarding to help them through it. I also saw the ugly side of what the lack of regulation causes within the sex industry in concerns of racism, sexism, and lack of safety.
The foundation of Wild Flower was built on a retaliation to these things. I believe that a lot of the shame and pain around sex that we feel as a society is directly linked to our lack of sexual education, specifically on pleasure and consent. I wanted to change that.
AM: You’re very passionate about women’s empowerment. How does Wild Flower Sex play a part in inspiring strong women?
AB: During my time as a dominatrix, I would have a lot of women contact me, tell me tragic stories about their sex lives, and ask guidance to help find a sense of empowerment. It was important for me to create a platform in Wild Flower which was a safe space for all marginalized groups, especially women. Our society as a whole has some very harmful ideals about female sexuality that women often feel that their sexuality isn’t theirs to own. I wanted to show women that your sexuality wasn’t for anyone but yourself, that you don’t have to look a certain way to feel sexy, and that it is your right to have pleasure! I encourage women and femmes to engage with their bodies and celebrate everything from periods to orgasms!
AM: As someone who manages a busy e-commerce site in a fast paced city, how do you maintain balance?
AB: Being mindful is very important. I learned about mindfulness and its benefits a few years back when I got certified as a yoga teacher. I make sure to be in the moment and reflect on the bigger picture. This helps me put things into perspective, allowing me not to get caught up in the little annoying things that may go askew day to day.
I also take breaks. Grab a cup of tea, go for a walk, call a friend. I talk a lot about self care at Wild Flower because of how much it has helped me. I like to think of myself as a battery. If I use some of my energy on something, I need to take the time to recharge.
AM: What does wellness mean to you?
AB: Wellness is a sense of balance in all aspects of your life. Its not about being perfect or trying to attain unreachable ideals. It’s more so about nurturing your mind, body, and spirit to get closer to your sense of self and that is all about balance. Eat healthy but treat yourself. Exercise. Have quality orgasms. Socialize but enjoy time alone.
AM: What are 5 of your dreams?
1. To develop Wild Flower to point where I can support my family, hire all my talented friends, and make a real impact.
2. I would love to develop a line of books for children and teens around sex, pleasure, consent, and gender.
3. Create real change in legislation around sex toy safety, sexual education in schools, and sex worker's rights.
4.To be a part of the change to make our society a safe space for people of color and all people on the LGBTQIA spectrum.
5. To own a candy store!
AM: Favorite song to work out to:
AB: Currently is LMK by Kelela
AM: Three things that are always in your bag:
AB: A good book, snacks, and business cards
AM: How would you describe your style in two words?
AB: Lara Croft meets skater boy
AM: One place in the world you would love to visit:
AM: Favorite kind of exercise:
AB: Boxing and yoga
AM: Favorite good vibe quote (you can also list a few if you want - your choice!):
"You may not be able to control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them” - Maya Angelou
“You are your best thing” - Toni Morrison
AM: 1 food you could not live without:
AB: Peanut butter
AM: Favorite health food spot in NYC:
AB: Peace foods or Juice Press
AM: If you were deserted on an island, what one item would you want with you?
AB: My vibrator!
AM: Favorite sinful treat food:
AB: I’m a chocolate fiend
AM: Favorite way to start the day:
AB: Waking up next to my husband and puppy.
AM: Top 3 things you do to keep a positive outlook:
AB: Work out daily, get enough sleep, and take the time to reflect.
You can visit Amy's site here!
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